Monday, May 3, 2010

today.

so... this weekend i got to hang out with my mom... i love her :) since bryan is gone and my dad is out of town it was just the 2 of us. we watched lots of movies and were lazy and we went shopping and i got a macbook! i'm so excited... now i can skype and edit pictures and not get viruses! also she got me an awesome graduation dress. i feel spoiled... thank you mom! it was a wonderful break from life...

i feel like my life is all jumbled up right now. except really it's not... i guess. i don't know.
i'm trying to organize my thoughts and i can't. i have lots of different stuff to be excited about, but it's hard to get excited about one or the other because there's just so much else going on... make sense?

i'm graduating from college in 5 days. that is weird. i can't even believe it... i have 1 more paper and some ministry hours to submit, then i'm done. crazy!

it doesn't feel like the end.

it could be because i'm staying in my house this summer, so i don't have that moving out aspect that i've had the last 3 years to remind me that it's summer time. or it could be because i still have 6 tefl units to go, so i basically will still have homework until those are done. or it could be because i still have to get all my visa stuff together. i actually have most of it together, but i'm waiting on my degree and final transcript to send it all out. also, like an idiot, i opened my transcript from australia and broke the seal, so now i have to request a new one. oops!
i don't know... maybe i'm in denial. or maybe i'm just over it. i was watching an old episode of laguna beach the other day (HA!) and it was the graduation episode. i had about 5 minutes of a sentimental reality check, but then it went away. i don't know why... i'm just not that upset about the idea of leaving college behind. i've never really been one to look back. i'm not a joiner... i don't go back and visit high school teachers, and i won't come back and visit college. it's just not the way i am.

i think the reason why i'm so not upset is because i'm more just excited about the future. i love my friends that i've made in college to death, and, yes, i am going to miss them like crazy. it does make me sad to think that i will not be here for some things. but more than that, i am so excited to see what happens. i'm excited because i know that God has a plan for all of our lives... this was just a short season, and it's only the beginning of the amazing things that He is going to do. and i can't wait to see it! i can't wait to see where everyone ends up, what they end up doing, who they end up doing it with, and how everyone will grow. i can't even imagine living not knowing that God has a plan... it not only brings so much peace, but it makes everything more exciting because i know that His plans go beyond anything i can imagine! it's such a cool feeling...

speaking of God's plans... bryan is in uganda! i got to talk to him on saturday and hear more about it... he loves the people and the country is beautiful, and he's already attached to some of the kids. it's so exciting for me to see him being exactly where i know God wants him right now. i just know in my heart that God has amazing plans for him there, and i've already seen how the Lord has worked things out for him. if you think about it, please pray for bryan that he will really find his niche and that God will show him what he needs to be doing there specifically (each volunteer is supposed to pick a project to do for musana... bryan doesn't know what he wants to do yet). and pray for the other volunteers and the organization as a whole, and for emma and nico, two of the kids that bryan has already become attached to.

also while you're praying... maybe shoot one up there for me and the half marathon (i registered today!). my foot has been acting up, so now i'm behind on my training. lame... but i've rested it longer this time, so i'm hoping that will make a difference and i will be able to train harder now.

anyways... this post ended up longer than expected.

praise the Lord for His goodness and for working everything out according to His purposes!

2 comments:

maren said...

you gave me goosebumps. i love you, kails!

mom said...

I am so proud to call you my daughter. I love you! Mom